Someone turned the world OFF....
We get comfort in thinking that we are in control and making plans that give us that sense of control over our own destinies. We invest our time, energy and focus in organizing gatherings, planning events, preparing to present to one another, go on walks, meet for coffee, manifesting a destination wedding, meeting for coffee. We even plan and organize down or alone time if and when needed. So much of ourselves are invested in the plans we make for the future that give us something to look forward to fill our mental, emotional sometimes spiritual selves up with.
The truth is, human beings are social beings. We are "hard wired for connection" quoting from Brené Brown’s The Power of Vulnerability Ted Talk. And as such, to experience this global crisis which has brought our plans and trips and gatherings and weddings and conference to a grinding halt is riveting.
A holiday weekend is coming up. We are told to maintain our physical distancing, to stay inside and not to travel or to gather. We accept this. The plans we had to gather and celebrate and meet and share have all been canceled - worldwide. Our plans, our hopes, our celebrations, our traditions that are based on gathering, have been stripped away. We are not in control of this. We can't control this. We have to adjust mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually, even energetically to this new normal (even if temporarily). This takes time. It is a process. It is different for everyone.
As a result, what many of us may be experiencing but not able to name is grief. We are in the process of grieving our lives and plans of our pre-Covid lives and not yet in the place of accepting our present experience. We certainly can't plan for our post-Covid lives as there is so much that is still unknown.
In honor of the process that you might be going through, we have shared some links at the end of this post to articles and the stages of grieving so that you might see yourself in them and normalize your experience. This may bring you some comfort and hope as you see your way to the point of acceptance.
On our coaching calls we are hearing things like "we are in this together", "we will get through this" - all a reflection of our strength as a united world faced with the same threat. As we accept our grief and sorrow, we also may find comfort in knowing that we are all going through this together and we will get through this.
To end with beautiful words from Rumi:
"Sorrow prepares you for joy.
It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place."
COVID-19 and the Grief Process (Weiss, R., Psychology Today, based on Elizabeth Kübler Ross Stages of Grief, 2020, March 30))
Grieving the Losses of Corona Virus (Gottlieb, L., New York Times, 2020, April 03)
That discomfort you are feeling is grief (Berinato, S., Harvard Business Review, 2020, March 23)
The 5 Stages of Grief & Loss (Axelrod, J., Psychcentral, 2019, November 20)
Free 1hr Dial-in Session "Anxiety surrounding COVID-19" (Lerae Gidyk, upcoming event APRIL 23, 2020, 6PM(pt)